See Faux Go

Wendy Anae, coach of BYU Women's Basketball and sister to Robert Anae, defensive coach of BYU Football, Hina Hunkin, my favorite French-Tahitian and moi.

*********************

I have been besieged lately by crazy comments and questions about looking younger than my age which is so annoying because I'm discovering more and more little wrinkles and sagging than I care to even mention. This is so comical to me because well, first of all, I'm Asian. You should see my friend Nori. She is about to kiss 50 but she looks like a 20 year old! Anyway, to Caucasians, we seem to age very, very slowly. But we Asians on the other hand, can see very well how we age because we see ourselves differently. It's a paradox.

But in thinking about it, I began to consider WHO were making these comments and in considering that, I've come up with pretty clever observations.

First, most of the women who ask what I'm doing have themselves 'given up'. I mean, just because we are in our 50s doesn't mean that we have to dress or look dowdy. What I've noticed is that most of them don't use make-up to even out their complexion. As Caucasians age, their skin seems to get ruddy and the colours uneven. That ages them. It would be easy to just take time and find the right type of foundation--cream, liquid, powder or mineral--whatever works for their skin type. That doesn't require much and they SHOULD take the time. Secondly, I think they need to learn how to apply or better yet, blend concealers under their eyes and under their brows. This takes some experimentation and practice because the skin around our eyes can be very thin and so applying highlighters/concealers can actually make it look worse if not mastered correctly. This is not hard to do. All you need is a good mirror and realistic eyes. I think when we age, we lose our playfulness and the joy of experimentation and it shows in the way we dress and present ourselves. That's when we begin to look shabby. So experiment, practice and search for the right foundation and concealers.

Next, I think that as we age, our lips lose their definition. What's the problem with wearing lipstick? I mean, if moms in their 40s and 50s go to church with red lipstick, does that mean that they're 'looking'? Sheeezzz, sometimes I think Mormons have such dirty minds. Yeah---red lipstick can do wonders! There's also a way to use lipstick so that the pigment doesn't run through the vertical wrinkles around the lips. Again, this takes experimentation.

Speaking of lips, here's another biggee: your teeth. It's easy to purchase one of those whitening strips for your teeth but it takes effort to actually do it. Well---do it. Yellow teeth simply add 10 years to one's face. And if you're in your 50s, yellow, uncared for teeth make you look ancient and decrepit---so add 20 years! Invest in your smile. It's the easiest way to remove years from your face!

So then, how about getting a good haircut? I think its a worthy investment. Hair is your crown and yeah-- get a good haircut! And for Pete's sake---do they have to wear their gray like a badge of honor? Crap. There's nothing good about gray hair unless you get a professional colourist to do it for you WITH a good haircut. Dull hair is a crime. I've invested in some wonderful wigs that I wear when I have a bad hair day or when I just feel like it. I look at it like....wearing a nice hat. Wigs are now made so unbelievably well at affordable prices. Again, experiment. Everytime I go to my favorite wig store I try on at least a dozen before I find one that makes me look good!

How about your shoes? Do they have to be eeekily banal? ANd is eekily a word? Nevermind. Shoes! I love shoes! Wearing high heels is an ability one has to acquire. If you give up that ability, you will forever be cast into the dowdy shoe outer darkness. Comfort is NOT an excuse. Work into it again! I used to be able to run wearing 3 inch stiletto heels. Not anymore. First of all, I have more weight to pack. Secondly, I gave up the ability. Now I am working up to it. I can be comfortable with 2.5 inch kitten heels. I'm working my way up. Just because I'm 53 doesn't mean I can't wear those sexy high heels! Oh my gosh---look at Tina Turner.

And lastly, check out the latest magazines for good fashion sense. True, there are certain styles I'd never consider that women in their 20s or even 30s can get away with. But why would I want to wear a tunic with lace leggings? But consider this: women in their 50s don't have to limit their palette to black or neutral colours. And we don't have to wear suits to look believable. We can wear sexy jeans. We can wear yellow. We can punch that dark suit with a red scarf or...hey even wear purple tights with those boots! And fishnet stockings. Yeah. I wear those. Why the hell not?

While I haven't had botox in over two years, I would have no compunction whatsoever about doing it. I've just been lazy because my doctor moved west side and I'm too lazy to find another to do the deed. But I'll do it as soon as I can. Oh and a couple of syringes of Restylane to smooth out my furrows and the naso-labial creases. Yeah. Painful. Oh so painful but after the deed, I will look like I went on a long vacation to Paris and came back totally renewed and serene. I'd do that again too. It's been three years since that first experience but I'd totally do it again.

Oh, and let's not forget that I've started going to the gym again. I haven't lost an ounce yet but I can see the difference already just in that extra spring in my step. And giving up sugar and white flour really does change your countenance...though I do cheat on more than one occasion. After all, I'm 53 and I can do whatever the hell I want.

And here's a postscript: I don't let being overweight paralyze me into thinking that I can only wear black to make me look smaller. Who would I be kidding? Matter occupies space and the space my matter occupies cannot be camouflaged. So that's that.