REFERENCE, PLEASE!

Often, during lesson discussions or talks, I hear members of the church quoting what supposedly, are the Saviour's comforting words whenever one is beset by trials and adversity: I never said it would be easy...I only said it would be worth it. Many times, there would be tears and an accompanying heartfelt testimony. Consequently, I never had the zeal to challenge them to find me the book, chapter and verse because I didn't have the heart to see the blank look on their faces, the stuttering of their words or their embarrassment or mortification when it finally dawns on them that those words simply do not exist in any scripture that we accept as the standard works of the church. But the frequency with which I find myself in this deliciously high octane moment is so high and I am now convinced that studying the scriptures and essential gospel principles are not as popular as I expected it to be.

I want to list some of the common Mormon rhetoric that seems to make sense on first blush and yet, if we wake up from the catatonia of complacency, becomes a conundrum of triteness and befuddlement.

"I never said it would be easy, I only said it would be worth it" negates the very words of Christ as quoted in the New Testament:

Come unto me all ye that labour and are heavy laden for I will give you rest. Take my yoke upon you and learn of me; for I am meek and lowly in heart: and ye shall find rest unto your souls. For my yoke is easy and my burden is light. (Matthew 11:28-30)

Clearly, the abundant life that follows the teachings of the Saviour is one that is free from the shackles and devastation of sin. Life indeed does come packaged with strife, challenges and hardship---that is a given. But the blessings and untold treasures that come from availing of the gifts of the Atonement through faith, repentance, baptism and the right to the companionship of the Holy Ghost brings us the balm of Gilead. Indeed, Christ never told us it would be 'difficult' but rather, the opposite. He provides us the easy way where our burdens can be made light.

I fear that my head will explode if I hear this common false and to a degree, dangerous rhetoric that is haplessly being propagated. I wish to curtail it's proliferation and replace it with truth.

Mormon Royalty

What is Mormon Royalty? One who is born into the covenant and is related to someone important in the church and/or whose ancestors crossed the plains.

Oh---and of course, they act like royalty.

HOME BY ANOTHER WAY

I was preparing for a seminary class the other day and upon reading the first 12 verses of Matthew 2, I was suddenly seized by what I would call a massive jolt of perception.

Matthew begins his writings by telling the story of certain wise men from the east who were inquiring among the townspeople about the Messiah, or the 'king of the jews' who was born according to ancient prophesies. Now, at this time, they all had seen a star in the heavens and were now anxious to worship him. Herod encourages them to find this child and then to return to him to give him more information regarding his location under the premise that he too, would worship him. Of course, Herod's intentions are more vile because what he wanted to do was kill the child who threatened his position.

The wise men then follow the star and find the Messiah bringing him treasures of gold, frankincense and myrrh. After their brief visit, they were warned in a dream about Herod's evil plot. To protect the Christ-child, they all decided to go home by 'another way'.

A great many pictures thus breezed through my mind after reading these short dozen verses. I remembered a moment that happened 33 years ago when I was sitting on a window seat in an airplane that was to fly me back to Oahu, Hawaii to return to BYU after serving a mission in Spain. I had just spent a few weeks in my home in the Philippines and those weeks were marred by so much confusion, sorrow and dread. The morning I was to leave, my father, as usual, began yelling at me and throwing accusations and horrible labels at me. I do not even remember the impetus of this rage focused entirely on me but I do remember that on my 2nd night home, he opened my bedroom door as I was on my knees in prayer. Minutes later, he began to levy every kind of curse word on me--supremely enraged that I would have the audacity to display my piety and self-righteous behaviour on him. I was so confused and all I wanted to do was throw up. That would be the theme of his rage and abuse towards me all the time I was home. Though there were times when he was his 'nice' and fun self, he could become this terrifying alter ego on a dime's turn.

After my last morning of rancor, verbal abuse and terror and when I finally found myself in that jet plane, I remember feeling numb until the plane began to move forward. As it did, a huge flock of birds appeared outside my window flying the opposite direction. I felt a surge of relief. I was free! And then I knew. I just knew that home would be another place. I knew that the next time I came 'home', I would not be the same and that I will find myself a new 'home' somewhere. I did not know the hows nor the wheres but I did know that from henceforth, the way home would be another way.

The second picture that I saw in my head happened just about 3 years ago. My son was home for a few days and it was his last evening with us before he flew back to Provo, Utah where he was attending college. He was also returning to make preparations to ask his girlfriend to marry him. He was in the dark, in the kitchen, softly crying. I asked him what was wrong and he could not tell me. After a few minutes, he told me that he was just seized by a feeling that this was going to be the last time he would feel that this was his home but that that didn't make any sense. I felt a sudden tug in my heart and yet, I KNEW what he was trying so hard to articulate. I proceeded to tell him about my experience in that jet plane. And I told him that unlike my experience, this home---his family, will always be his family, his home. The only difference is that he is going to make himself his very own home, with his very own wife and children to be. And also, I explained that when he comes back, he will still feel all the love there is. It will be different, but better. He was in essence, simply closing the door on an old life and opening a new one that to him, at that time, was still to be experienced and therefore, still daunting to think about. He will have new experiences, new responsibilities, new goals---a new direction--- a new way. The next time he comes home, it will be by another way. Just like the wise men he will come home by another way.

Then, my mind also wandered to a time one night a few weeks ago. I was talking to a couple who was having difficulties with their daughter. I knew their daughter well and though I can believe all the complaints levied against her by her parents, I also see her beautiful suffering spirit---and how delicate and sweet it is buried under feelings of confusion, guilt, self-hatred and quiet desperation. I knew that she needed so badly for her parents to just put their arms around her and reassure her that she is loved and loved deeply and that no matter how much she errs and slips, that love will never wane. I asked them if this is possible. Adamantly, they both rolled their eyes and expressed to me how difficult that would be for them to do because they simply do not like her. Her father made a comment that he only sees her for 10 minutes every day, in the mornings and that's not even enough time to tell her how disappointed he is about what she did the night before. If you can only see someone you love for 10 minutes, do you really want those 10 minutes to be spent letting her know how disappointed you are in her? That is a no-brainer! I challenged him to indeed just forego his need to reprimand her and just find something that is positive about her even if its just that she did her hair nicely and then put his arm around her and just tell her that he loves her. He said that that would indeed be nearly impossible to do because of how he feels about her EVEN if he knows that that is the right thing to do. I told him that the Spirit often compels us to do something that is INDEED hard to do and oftentimes against what we believe is our nature--but isn't this how it works? He agreed but said he can't do it. I felt bad. He wanted to stay on the same course even if it takes him to the same place where nothing changes. It was time for him to 'go home by another way'. But he couldn't. I hope that he finds his way 'home by another way'. Putting our arms around someone may not solve everything right away but gee whiz---it's time.

Herod, himself a Jew, represents Satan well. Truly, he who would be so willing to slay innocent children---not just male but both male and female innocents-- is not to be trusted. He, like Satan, would fleece all wise men of their gold, frankincense and myrrh. He, like Satan, would viciously and surreptitiously deceive us so we can be complicit in destroying the "Christ-child" or more clearly, anything god-like that is engendered in us. He, like Satan, lies in wait to sabotage our goals and steal from us all things that we are entitled to as children of our Heavely Father. So just like the wise men, do we have the gumption, the wherewithal, the strength of character to boldly 'go home by another way?" I sure hope so.

Reading these verses also reminded me of a song I heard only once, a long time ago sung by James Taylor. I tried to find the title of the song on the internet and it wasn't until I had the bright idea of looking on iTunes that I found the song. It is a little known tune and hardly ever got air time but the lyrics are so earnest. And dead on.

I am going to post below the lyrics to that song. And then below it, the video that I put together today. It was a full day's work but so worth it. I gave up shopping at Anthropologie to do this. There's always Monday to go shopping anyway.

Here goes:

Those magic men, the Magi, some people call them wise
Or Oriental, even kings; well, anyway, those guys—
They visited with Jesus. They sure enjoyed their stay.
Then warned in a dream of King Herod’s scheme, they went home by another way.

Yes, they went home by another way; home by another way.
Maybe me and you can be wise guys too and go home by another way.
We can make it another way, safe home as they used to say.
Keep a weathered eye to the chart on high and go home by another way.

Steer clear of royal welcomes; avoid the big to-do.
A king who would slaughter the innocents will not cut a deal for you.
He really, really wants those presents; he’ll comb your camel’s fur.
Until his boys announce they’ve found trace amounts of your frankincense, gold and myrrh.

Time to go home by another way; home by another way.
You have to figure the gods saying play the odds and go home by another way.
We can make it another way; safe home as they used to say.
Keep a weathered eye to the chart on high and go home by another way.

Home is where they want you now.
You can more or less assume that you’ll be welcome in the end.
Mustn't let King Herod haunt you so
Or fantasize his features when you’re looking at a friend.

Well it pleasures me to be here and to sing this song tonight.
They tell me that life is a miracle, and I figure that they’re right.
But Herod’s always out there; he’s got your cards on file.
It’s a lead pipe cinch, if we give an inch old Herod likes to take a mile.

It’s best to go home by another way; home by another way.
We got this far to our lucky star, but tomorrow is another day.
We can make it another way; safe home as they used to say.
Keep a weathered eye to the chart on high and go home by another way.

HOME BY ANOTHER WAY

ALONE IN THE DARK

Teaching 6am seminary isn't as bad as I thought it would be---although the first morning that I drove into the parking lot, I was suddenly aware of how vulnerable I was. First of all, it was still dark...and it will get even darker as summer comes to an end. Secondly, I was all alone there. Today when I pulled in at 5:30am, there was a jeep parked behind where I usually park and I could see there was a shadow of a man on the driver's side. I didn't know what to do. Should I stay in my car until someone else arrives? Should I call someone? I knew I still had to set up and sharpen some red markers for my students and that imperative made me shrug my shoulders, open my car door, grab all my stuff and then confidently stride over to unlock the door. I did not walk fast nor hurry. I actually took my time, looking behind at the jeep with an annoyed look on my face. I knew the driver could see me because there was a lamp post by the doors. I just made sure he knew I was annoyed.

Luckily, my husband decided to follow me this morning to make sure I was safe and was a minute behind. As soon as I called him on my cell, he was literally driving into the parking lot. Turns out the man was a substitute for one of the teachers who decided to come early to prepare for his lesson. But it made me think that I really should carry a big gun to seminary. After all, my trigger finger is steady, my aim is astonishingly accurate and I wouldn't hesitate when threatened.

Nevetheless, the point is, should a lone woman really be alone in the dark at the church building?

BEST ROMANTIC SCENE OF THE SUMMER
(From "Miss Pettigrew Lives For A Day")

DOING NOTHING IN HAWAII

We arrived EARLY yesterday morning after a 5 hour 40 minute flight via FIRST CLASS accommodations on Hawaiian Airlines. WOW. It was fantastic-- to say the least though after being spoiled flying business class on Northwest Airlines with ample space and comfortable seats that could handle horizontal positions, we thought HA first class accommodations were spartan with space but not with food and entertainment.

Most of the day was spent doing NOTHING. Kurt didn't even get to the beach or the pools. He just slept on the lanai for the most part. He needed it. Today they are out snorkeling and I am left here at my request to read and blog. I have not even read the curriculum for seminary and I start in less than 2 weeks. Yikes. So I better get working....albeit on the lanai overlooking the beautiful ocean and smelling the salt air and breeze. It's paradise here.

We did stock up on food--going to Costco for local fare and Longs for beach accoutrements and frou frou. I love going to Costco in Hawaii (Waipahu) because they sell stuff that you can't buy on the mainland like fried saimin, taro bread, Ted's pies and cakes, shrimp chips, lup chong, char siu pork...etc. Not to mention every permutation of macadamia nuts one can think of. We are eating well!

Tomorrow, the plan is to go to the Polynesian Cultural Center for tours, dinner and evening show. Of course we will get great seats because of our great connections and I requested to have a cute, single male tour guide so my daughters can have fun. (HA!) I am looking forward to a great day. Of course, we will make a quick turn to have some Matsumoto Shave Ice as usual. Yahoooo!!

I really needed this quick get away and I think the week will go REALLY fast.

Jordan Gets Married!

My oldest son, Jordan, married Rose Card in the LDS Provo Temple on August 9, 2008. The ceremony was short and sweet. Their reception was held the day before the wedding at Rose's parents' home in Orem, Utah. We had a luncheon for about 86 people at the Northampton House in American Fork and it was very nice. Hannah and Nate added much needed class and ambience to the occasion when they played jazz piano and saxophone whilst guests arrived at the reception hall. They played beautifully.

It was a very interesting day for me. I felt almost uncannily calm---almost abnormal for me. I think it was because I did not really want to be in Utah and I felt that I did not have any relatives on my side to give me the needed support I needed. I was so grateful my sister and brother-in-law came all the way from Mission Viejo, California. That was SO needed.

I had another interesting, unexpected experience. While sitting in the waiting room in the temple, Nate's mom, Kristi, walked into the room alone to attend the sealing. She had driven Nate all the way from Henderson, Nevada so he could play the sax at the luncheon and I invited her to come to the sealing. I did not expect that she would come but come she did. What was unexpected was my reaction---upon seeing her, I felt a wave of relief to see a familiar face from home. It was so out of context because she did not belong to my family nor to Kurt's family but precisely because it was out of context and because she was part of my 'home', it just felt so good to see her. She will never know the impact she had just being there. It was so comforting.

Anyway, the luncheon was nice and I made sure I took care of small details that made it all special.

It was also so sweet that Jordan's cadre of close friends came from far away places---from Washington D.C., Arizona, etc... just to be with him and support him. That was very touching.

Jordan and Rose are now on their way to Washington DC where Jordan will complete two more years of law school at George Washington University. It will be very exciting for both of them to have this new adventure. I am SO happy that he has Rose and that he is so happy with her.

IT'S SUMMER OF 2008!

I can't believe I finished teaching one year of seminary. That's the whole reason why I hadn't had the chance nor inclination to blog. My days consisted mostly of studying the Old Testament and other scriptures, researching ancient Jewish history and later, just general ancient world history. It was almost painful to close the year of studying the OT but now I have to prepare to teach the New Testament. I am SO excited to learn more...but really, not so much about teaching seminary. There are things I discovered about myself during this past school year of teaching daily for the first time: I have a hard time relating to mediocre people, I am a poor administrator, I am a disorganized and poor record keeper, I have no classroom protocol and logistics that are worth beans and I can be a pushover/doormat if I don't watch myself.

The new "teaching emphasis" protocol of teaching seminary is challenging because it forces you to actually employ techniques that require creativity of thought and careful study of the material. Traditionally, seminary teachers LECTURED. That's no longer de rigeur nor was it ever effective...unless you are an entertainer and have a need to be fawned over. The idea is to help the students DISCOVER the lessons by themselves. A seminary teacher is not a lecturer. I am a facilitator. And while I do enjoy employing activities to make the lessons interesting and interactive, the hardest part of this emphasis is ASKING THE RIGHT QUESTIONS that will spark discovery and meaningful "Ah ha!" moments in class. I am intrigued by these challenges and next year, I intend to get better.

The real challenge though is simply relating to my students.

American teenagers are a totally different animal than the ones I am used to. Yeah. They do not have any sense of respect or decorum towards their elders like Asians do. They are rude. They are spoiled rotten and in my small experience, do not have any motivation to learn. Their study habits range from virtually none to mediocre. My 7am class was a huge challenge. The whole year, there was absolutely zero feedback. And then towards the end, they wanted credit for doing NOTHING. And they get upset if I don't give them them make-up work or credit as if they are entitled to everything when they didn't put in any effort at all. In the end, I thought that it really doesn't matter if I give them an A or pass them because seminary didn't really matter to them for the most part.

The afternoon classes that I taught as a substitute teacher was, on the other hand, amazing. They were motivated. Still sometimes rude but I would rather say they were more exuberant. They knew their material. They participated. They looked interested and I got a lot of feedback. I relished those days when I could teach them because I needed their feedback so that I didn't feel like I am the worst seminary teacher in the world. I could prepare for hours and hours the same lesson and it would be totally different taught in the afternoon as compared to my morning class. Lessons taught in the afternoon classes were more robust, meaningful and interesting. And I felt inspired by the students' participation and enthusiasm. Morning classes made me feel inadequate and my lessons meaningless. I fought these feelings for the whole year and hid them as much as I could. By the 3rd quarter, I just decided to teach and pretend that my students were interested. It knocked the winds out of me nearly every morning.

I sometimes wonder if the reason is because the afternoon classes were mostly kids who were honor students, orchestra, choir and band kids or all of the above---motivated students who kept the bar high. With the exception of possibly 2 students in my morning class, most of my students merely wanted to get by.

I really can't relate well with most of my morning students because I didn't grow up with kids like them. I went to an elite high school where every student was handpicked via rigorous screening exams so every single one was brilliant. And growing up, for the most part, my circle of friends were hungry for knowledge and experience as they were the early converts to the LDS church in Manila. We didn't even have seminary but we were so excited to attend and participate in any class or meeting.

Anyway, next year, I asked to teach the 6am class. Yeah. Crazy. But I am thinking that most of the students who go to 6am actually choose to be in that class. And most of them are band, choir, orchestra, sports or honors students. I did have the opportunity to sub for this class for a week. They are NOT like the afternoon class but still a huge improvement from my 7am class. So I am looking forward to this new experience---if I get to do it again.

FERRIS GRUMP
A roadshow skit I wrote and directed. The theme was "Parables from the Bible". Not content to just take one parable, I took the parable of the good samaritan and merged it with the parable of the prodigal son.

FINALLY, HERE IT IS!
The music video of ONE MIND ONE HEART

The video file had to be compressed into a smaller format to conform to the required size for this blog host-- which compromised the audio integrity so I lost my saxophone part---it's barely audible. That sucks. But the music is still, hopefully, enjoyable. For a better audio version, click on "Original Music" on left side of this page. You will be directed to the link that plays the mp3 version which is crystal clear.

My Christmas Time

(I thought I'd post a poem that I composed a few years back that reflects my feelings about the Saviour)

I’ve heard of Jesus who was born in a stable
Of wisemen, bright stars and other great fables
Of ivy and mistletoe and endless traditions
And interesting Christmas tales in various editions
But I find myself pondering on various occasions
A private concern above all life’s equations
Will I know Him when He comes in all His glory?
Will I recognize the truth, will I know the true story?

Will his voice be too soft for my ears to hear?
Or will my heart embrace His words strong and clear?
Will I recognize His tender face on sight?
Or will He just be another star in the night?
Will I hesitate to run to Him and rather just hide?
Or will my feet simply know the way to His side?
I better get to know Him now, this very minute then
For soon He comes and no one knows the hows or wheres or when

I Know His hands fashioned Moses’ laws on heavy mountain blocks
And these same fingers touched 16 stones to glow as fiery rocks
His hands bid the tempest calm and thunderous winds to cease
These same hands can at moment’s call give indescribable peace

He called the little children and blessed them ‘round his knee
He showed the way for Lehi to go across the sea
And then upon a boy who prayed in faith implicitly
He gifted truth in fullness clear and quiet simplicity

Many sing and carols ring of a baby born in a manger
And yet to them this babe is like another faceless stranger
To me He is my Prince, my King, my brother and my friend
Because I know He lived on earth and still He lives again

Sometimes late at long days end, I kneel in private prayer
I hear the rustling of his robes, of his presence I’m full aware
I can almost feel His hand upon, my heavy shoulder’s rest
For deep in prayer after scripture time is when I feel Him best

Once a year the world takes pause for gifts and a Christmas tree
I’ll close my eyes and imagine Him right here just close to me
And everyday I’ll do just that as I learn life’s lessons sweet
For my Christmas time is that one great day when I fall upon His feet.

Written by: E.Christie deRama-Faux
©2001 All Rights Reserved

ONE MIND ONE HEART

On the side of my page is a link to the song entitled: One Mind One Heart.

Music and lyrics by Christie Faux.

The wonderful singer is Gail Ellen Bennett, an actor who right now is in the cast of the Las Vegas production of "The Producers" and recently completed filming the role of Queen Esther for CES. Hannah Faux on piano and Jordan Faux on bass and electric guitar. The wonderful saxophone solo was executed by Nate Camp, the seminary president. The song was inspired by our seminary theme for this year, One Mind, One Heart which in turn was inspired by Moses 7:18.

Enjoy!

SHE'S DELIGHTFUL, DELIGHTSOME, SHE'S DE-LOVELY!

2000 GVHS Madrigals: Can You Spot Leland?

Tati Time!

(Natascha is now a junior at Brigham Young University)

Hannah Sings "Families Can Be Together Forever" (1993)

(Hannah is now a freshman at Brigham Young University)

JORDAN on PRIMETIME
(Jordan is now a first year law student at George Washington University)

SEMINARY GEEKNESS

I am now a certifiable seminary geek. I am supposed to be in Hawaii tomorrow to attend the installation/inauguration of BYU-Hawaii's new president, Steve Wheelwright. We had a fabulous lunch at a friend's house and sat on the same table with him and his lovely wife as well as the Camps, who are a wonderful couple we have known for over 15 years. Margaret Wheelwright graciously encouraged us to attend tomorrow's festivities and as members of the President's Leadership Council, we are supposed to join all the campus events this week...and look all important. But I just couldn't leave my seminary class. My friends are all aghast and agog. So am I.

My seminary class is your average teenaged class. I mean, as a group, they are so challenging---nearly nil participation, blank looks, much talking in the back, habitually late, do not bring nor read their scriptures and are basically, just...there. Individually, however, they are the sweetest bunch of young people and I happen to just LOVE each one and sorely miss them when they don't show up. What I have noticed is that they suffer from a lack of vision. I mean, they have no inkling at all nor vision of what they can accomplish. It's like, no one told them they can. Get it? They can. They are just spectacular when they decide to deliver! I wish they would be more consistent and really "see" how fantastic they are.

All of them come from great families. Good parents. Sometimes though, when I least expect it, my class transforms and suddenly, everything gels and I see their spirits soaring and I see flickers of light dancing in their eyes. That's when I know they "get" what I am trying to make them "see" through the scriptures. Those days are so precious, few and far in between. And this is why I have a photo of me on my mission. The people above comprise the ENTIRE branch of Logrono, Spain in 1979. Yeah, small congregation. But they are the best.

My mission was very challenging because for the most part, no, make that ALL of its parts, we knocked doors. I mean, we knocked doors every single day from morning, noon and night. If we weren't knocking doors, we were walking the streets looking for more doors to knock. Sixteen months. That's all we did. And what would compel me to knock doors? The almost obsessive need for me to teach. Yeah, teach. I just wanted to find someone to teach. And I wasn't going to teach if I don't knock doors. Every door knocked is a potential teaching experience. So that's what I did. And that's exactly what seminary is like. You just never know what each day is going to bring. So you take each day like you treat each door--you just never know if this is the day that the kids will let you in. You prepare like each day is the most important teaching day. And you keep on showing up with hope and the expectation that today is the day that will mean more than they ever expected. Then, when you least expect it, the joy suddenly happens and you have a brilliant day! And when that happens, it's just sheer joy. I just have to expect that each day will be just that. And if it doesn't, you look forward and do it all over again with the same expectations and hopes. As the months roll by, the spaces between lackluster days and joyful days become shorter and shorter.

Yesterday was a miracle. I had only one absence. And 3 students who never arrived early, actually arrived early. Wow. And I was supposed to be in Hawaii.

And today was a particularly spiritual and effective session.

I am missing two trips that I usually do not miss over seminary. I don't know if I can do this next year. But for now, I am certifiably, a seminary geek.